city girl with flower vision drawing, originally uploaded by {studiobeerhorst}-bbmarie.

Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. Your not in the drivers seat, I am. Dont run from suffering, embrace it. Follow me and I’ll show you how. (from Matthew 16, The Message Bible)

My life is haunted by this verse. I don’t like suffering and would prefer to never experience any and yet I know in my heart that it are these difficult experiences that I must go through that give my life its real potent color and my heart its tenderness.

Last friday Brenda and I were invited to go out to the movies with a couple of friends in the neighborhood. We were both excited by the prospect of a fun night out with friends. About 15 minutes before we were going to be picked up another neighbor stopped over asking to borrow some silver paint. I went downstairs to look for it and as I was looking through my supplies I slipped and bumped into a water pipe which cracked and began shooting water all over the basement floor. At this moment Brenda was upstairs getting herself beautiful for a rare night out. The crack happened between the main shut off valve and the pipes entrance out of the basement concrete floor. There was no way for me to shut it off and our friends were now at the door to take us to the movies. The whole situation felt really horrible as I watched water take over the basement floor.

We were able to tie off the pipe and slow the leak enough so that the basement drain kept the water from taking over the basement. We still went to the movies after a call to Goodwin Plumbing. We had a nice night out and the next morning we paid the plumber $394 after he had made everything dry, new and shiny again. The next night Saturday the Rick Beerhorst Band played a show at the DAAC with Seth and The Illogical Spoon and we had so many people come out we reached capacity and had to turn people away at the door. A wonderful young woman (also a neighbor) who heard me share our plumbing adventure from the stage felt lead to give my her food card which still had $240 for the month. She explained how she had all her groceries for the month and would like me to use up what was left on the card to buy groceries for our family. With the money value of that card together with the money off the door and CD sales we ended up making everything back we had to pay the plumber with in $2.

Our life together is often difficult but it is also an amazing adventure with God in the driver seat who by the way does not feel like a “safe” driver.

[6] Comments 

The Great Provider, originally uploaded by {studiobeerhorst}-bbmarie.

I have written over and over in this blog about our family’s struggle with money. The struggle is usually about not having enough. We just get through paying all the bills and buying all the food each month with just inches to spare. Now and then there is a surplus in the savings account for a while but then it gets absorbed by the need for a new computer, meteorite damage, or a slow month of sales. We have lived inside of this wrestling match for ever. It has become our excepted way of life. A few weeks before Christmas I began praying/fasting for a break through in this area in a focused way. During this time I was forced out of my carriage house studio by the cold and relocated to the basement. I began reorganizing the basement and de cluttering. After I got the basement in shape I moved on to the kitchen doing the same. As I worked on the house I sensed that God was working on the inside of me at the same time- cleaning out, de cluttering, reorganizing. The fasting has ended. The praying continues and there is not a concrete “break through” I can point to like the sale of an expensive painting (which is usually how we think of our break through will come) but I really believe something is shifting inside of me and in our physical circumstances. If you are reading this and are the sort of person given to prayer please pray for us that we will have “ears tuned to wisdom” in this area of God’s provision and what our part is in that mystical union. If you are not a person of prayer perhaps you could stumble through a little awkward prayer and try something new. Thank you for reading and praying.

[3] Comments